Laura

compassion, mental health, physical health, wellbeing, wellness

Monday Matters: The benefits of engaging in small acts of kindness, plus some RAK ideas for you to try this week

Posted on Sep 23, 2024Sep 20, 2024 by Laura

Most of us are familiar with the abbreviation RAK i.e. Random Acts of Kindness and are likely to have given or received one or more of these over the course of the year. Kindness from another, whether they’re a complete stranger, an acquaintance or someone much closer has the potential to brighten our day, make us feel good inside, change our mindset, and even restore our faith in humanity. But, as well as this, research shows that helping others is wonderful for our mental health and wellbeing, so it has huge benefits for the giver too. Today, I thought I’d discuss some of the benefits of doing things for others and also list a few easy and low cost RAK ideas that you might like to give a try.

Releases positive ‘feel good’ chemicals

Acts of kindness towards others has been scientifically studied and the research shows that not only do they have the potential to make the recipient feel warm and fuzzy inside, they also release dopamine, serotonin and oxytocin (feel good hormones) in the giver, creating feelings of euphoria which have been described as a ‘helpers high’.

Reduces stress levels

On the subject of feel good chemicals, the release of oxytocin (sometimes referred to as the love hormone) has also been shown to counteract the production of stress hormones like cortisol. As well as creating calm, lower stress levels can also help with physical ailments that are often precipitated or aggravated by stress such as headaches, back pain, neckache, stomach complaints, poor immunity, low energy levels and fatigue, sleeplessness or insomnia.

Increases positive emotions and mood

On a similar theme, small acts of kindness towards others can brighten our mood and make us feel much more positive in general. When we regularly engage in good deeds, it increases positive emotions in us such as contentment, happiness and joy. It can also boost our self-esteem and generally make us feel more optimistic.

Reduces negative emotions

In addition, with being filled with positivity will naturally reduce negative emotions and feelings such as anger, sadness, anxiety, depression, discontent and loneliness. Obviously, it’s normal to feel some of the above at times, but kindness towards others can help to put you in a positive frame of mind and stop negativity from taking over.

Creates a chain reaction

When the recipient of your RAK experiences the feelings of happiness it creates, it’s likely to inspire them to do something kind for someone else and this kindness can then be paid forward, creating a chain reaction. Here’s a video you might like to watch which shows a kindness being paid forward – yes, it’s not necessarily a true to real life situation, but I think it provides a heartwarming illustration.

Creates a real sense of belonging and reduces feelings of isolation

Finally, being kind towards our partner, children, other family members, work colleagues, neighbours and even strangers helps us to feel a deep social connection and trust in others. This can lead to better relationships and the belief that we are a key part of the workplace and local community. It can also reduce feelings of social isolation and loneliness in ourselves and the individuals who receive our kind acts.

Some RAK to try today

Some of the RAKs involve a small financial outlay, but there are also many free ideas too. I’ve tried to include a wide mix of suggestions, so hopefully there’s something there for all of my readers.

feed the birds in your garden or local park (please avoid giving bread to ducks though as it isn’t healthy for them)
buy a treat for your pet and watch them enjoy it
hold the door open for someone
help a person who is carrying a heavy load
buy a bunch of flowers for someone who’s having a hard time
thank your server for being attentive when out for a meal
go for a nature walk and say ‘good morning’ or offer a friendly ‘hello’ and a smile to everyone you meet
donate some unused items to charity
compliment someone on their choice of outfit or accessories for the day
leave a surprise somewhere for a friend, family member or complete stranger to find e.g. put a post it note in your child’s school lunchbox saying ‘I love you’ or ‘I hope you’re having a nice day’, paint a pebble with a bright rainbow and leave it at the base of a tree in the woods, hide your partner’s favourite chocolate bar in their bag etc.
if someone is popping out for lunch and it’s raining, lend them your umbrella
put an item or two in a food bank
let someone who has a small number of items go before you in the supermarket
show your appreciation for a fitness instructor whose classes you particularly enjoy
offer to get groceries for an elderly neighbour or someone who is sick
donate old magazines to be put in a waiting room e.g. at a doctor’s or dental surgery
bake cookies for your work colleagues
if someone is new to your gym class, your place of work or somewhere else you go regularly, find opportunities to get to know them and ask them how they’re finding things
when out and about for the day somewhere, offer to take a photograph for an individual, couple or family so that they can all be in the shot
create a wildlife friendly area in your garden, for example, by scattering wildflower seeds, putting up a bug hotel or allowing leaves to pile up in a corner
write a list of things you love about your partner, child, friend or work colleague and share it with them
leave a nice comment on a blog post, YouTube video or picture shared on Instagram
leave a positive review for a small business who have given particularly good service
give a book to a friend you think might enjoy it
send a surprise gift in the post to a loved one
donate to your favourite charity
offer some helpful advice to a member of an online group you belong to
let someone out in front of you when driving in heavy traffic
call or text a friend you haven’t spoken to in a while
send an interesting online article to a friend or family member you think might benefit from or enjoy it
offer a lift to someone
write a summary about a place you’ve visited on TripAdvisor so that other potential similar visitors know what to expect if they go
message an author to say how much you enjoyed their first / latest book
post a good news story on social media
make a self care package to give to someone you think would benefit from it
take part in a community litter pick
stop and take time to talk to a neighbour – even if you’re super busy!
give up your seat on public transport to someone who needs it more than you
volunteer your time for example, to walk a neighbour’s dog, to do some babysitting for a friend of family member, to go to the shops for someone, to help teach someone a skill such as reading, knitting, sewing, crochet or computing

Final words…

As you go about your day today, try to think of at least one way you can make a difference to someone. It doesn’t matter how small your gesture of kindness is or whether it is costly (financially or time wise) or not. One you get started with offering random acts of kindness, you’ll find that more and more opportunities and ideas will present themselves, making it easier and easier by the day.

After giving or receiving a RAK, why not do a short amount of journalling about it in a notebook to explore the positive effects it has had. Alternatively, you could create a short post about it on Facebook, explaining how you felt afterwards and celebrating kindness towards others. You might even prompt someone else to think about what they could do to help another person in their life.

Home cooking, relationships

Monday Matters: Why cooking together is good for your relationship

Posted on Sep 9, 2024Sep 8, 2024 by Laura

Over the last month or so, my husband and I have been sitting down together and creating a meal plan each week. I write the plan in my bullet journal, whilst my husband writes a shopping list of everything we’ll need from the supermarket. Doing this plan has many benefits including developing a broad and balanced diet, less food waste, seasonal eating and picking out some healthy recipes which we’ve enjoyed before or would like to try making.

Although I’m always really tired by the end of the day due to various factors, including my medication and health conditions, I’m trying my best to make sure that my husband and I cook together most evenings. As we’ve been doing this, I’ve noticed so many benefits for our relationship, and this is what has lead me to write today’s Monday Matters blog post. I hope you enjoy reading and are prompted to give collaborative cooking a go. I promise you it can be so much fun, even if you have a small kitchen and have to fight for preparation space!!!

Quality time together

We all want to spend as much quality time with our romantic partner as we can, and cooking together each evening can be a great part of this. Making dinner is a necessary chore but it can be turned into a more enjoyable and relaxing experience if it becomes a joint venture. The whole process of preparing ingredients, cooking, eating and clearing up afterwards not only offers opportunities for mindful activity, it also has the benefit of bonding and strengthening your relationship too.

Teamwork

Creating a dish together is a great teamworking activity where you can share out the preparation, read sections of the recipe out to each other and discuss who’s going to do what to equally divide the tasks. Also, if you alternate who takes the lead, it can boost confidence levels and provide opportunities to practice being assertive as one of you can tell the other what you’d like them to do next, and so on. This can be a real eye opener or learning curve if one of you usually tends to dominate in the relationship in terms of decision making or as the saying goes ‘wears the trousers in the relationship’!

Shared memories

Whether the dish that you’ve spent hours creating turns out to be the most delicious thing you ever tasted, a complete disaster, or something in-between, you can guarantee that many of your shared cooking experiences will lead to fond or funny memories. In fact, according to Meik Wiking, author of The Art Of Making Memories, multisensory activities, of which cooking is a great example, create the most vividly recalled memories of all. Taking the time to really focus on your experiences whilst cooking together – sights, smells, sounds, taste and touch will not only help you de-stress after a busy day, but it will also contribute to positive memory making too.

Encouraging conversation

When following a recipe for the first time, it will certainly prompt lots of conversation about what you’re doing and which tasks you plan to do next. But, as you develop your cooking confidence, learn new skills or make favourite dishes again and again, there’s plenty of opportunity for discussion on a wider range of subjects. Sometimes it might involve sharing stories about your day or talking about how work is currently going, or the focus might turn to making plans for your weekend, an upcoming event or even where you’d like to go to on your future travels. Whatever you end up chatting about, open and meaningful communication is key for healthy relationships.

Developing new skills

There are so many different technical terms and cooking methods that you can learn as you develop your culinary skills together. This week, my husband and I made celeriac soup and the first step of the recipe was to dice onions and thinly slice celery and sweat them in a pan. I had no idea what this meant so I quickly checked on my phone and learned that it involves putting a little oil in the bottom of a saucepan, adding the ingredients and half covering with the pan lid to gently cook them on a low heat. I also found lots of tips for the method such as stirring every now and then and adding a little bit of salt to speed up the process. Next time I see this method in a recipe, not only will we know exactly what to do, it will also remind us of the time we made celeriac soup for the first time (and indeed the first time we’d even tried celery root).

Problem solving

Cooking together can help you both develop your general and cooking related problem solving skills as you make decisions around the preparation of the dish or think about what you might do differently next time. So, for example, you might learn that something takes longer to cook than the recipe said and make a note on the recipe page to remind you next time, or you might learn that your oven is particularly fierce and things get burnt if you stick to the oven temperature or time suggested. Or you might discover that your fridge is directly where you tend to chop all of the vegetables so it’s best to get out all of the required ingredients before one of you gets to work dicing and slicing. For us, we tend to modify recipes either because it serves 4 people or it has strong spices in it, and, as I can’t tolerate spicy meals we might spend some time deciding what flavourings we would use instead, or even if the recipe would work without the spice.

Final words…

In today’s post, I’ve discussed how cooking with your partner is good for your romantic relationship, but the same could certainly be applied to other relationships you have such as a house or flat mate, your children (if they’re old enough and capable of safe basic food preparation) or anyone else you live with or like to spend time at home with. Collaboration in the kitchen, in my opinion, is much better than an hour spent scrolling on your phone catching up on all the various social media platforms you frequent.

Let me know in the comments if you already enjoy cooking with family or friends or if it’s something you’d definitely like to give a try. Or, if not, I would also love to hear why you think it might not work for you personally.

art, bullet journal, Bullet journaling, creativity, goal setting, planner girl, planner lifestyle, Planning and journaling, watercolour painting

Setting up my bullet journal for September 2024: Night sky theme

Posted on Aug 31, 2024 by Laura

For my September bullet journal pages, I was inspired by a set of washi tapes that I found and purchased from TKMaxx (even though I have literally hundreds of rolls already – you can never have too much right?) They were all in similar shades of purple with some featuring tiny stars, crescent moons, Saturn, the moon phases and text saying ‘the stars shine for you’. In addition, the set included complementary patterns, a watercolour effect design plus a ‘to do’ tape for my running task lists. I wanted to use my paints to create an original piece of art that I could use for my front cover and, after spending a while perusing various night sky tutorials on YouTube, I finally settle on this one which explained the techniques really well and discussed use of colour and contrast as a key teaching point. I decided against adding dark tree outlines to the bottom and chose to add some stars and a moon using white gouache.

The front cover

As always, I used cold pressed watercolour paper and a wet on wet technique to ensure the colours blended seamlessly and there was no buckling of the paper as there would be if I’d painted directly onto my bullet journal page. This gave me a nice, clean design which I could photocopy using my printer and stick in. I wish I’d chosen thinner washi tape as a border because the finished piece ended up smaller than I wanted but I also didn’t want to scan and enlarge the piece as the stars would have ended up too big.

My original watercolour galaxy painting – Laura Jones

Photo credit: Laura Jones for Keeping It Creative

Monthly calendar

I decided to do a different calendar this month and opted for the style originally used by Ryder Carroll who is the creator of the bullet journal system. This involved writing the day numbers and the days of the week down the left hand side of the page, leaving space to write events and or happenings in the space to the write with one horizontal line for each day of the month. This allows the use of just one page for the entire calendar. I’ll let you know how I get on with it next month and whether I’ll continue to use this style or go back to my usual 6×6 dot spaces box calendar.

Finances

The one page calendar meant I ended up with a spare page to the right so I started my finance pages and then continued overleaf. Again, I’ve been making stickers for this month’s theme to decorate my spreads more quickly than drawing.

September goals

In order to not lose sight of what I want to achieve in September, I decided to create a goals page to refer to throughout the month. I opted to have two types of goal – health and fitness and business as this is what I want to focus on throughout September, aside from my work at the university.

Weekly layout

This is my first weekly, before the pen and I wanted to keep it simple so there’s plenty of room for events and a few to-dos each day. I’ll probably do a running task list for the week over the page but I intend to add some day specific tasks to the weekly calendar.

Final words…

Thank you for visiting my blog today to look at my bullet journal pages for September. I would love to hear in the comments what you think of my art work, my theme and set up.

Wishing you a lovely September filled with lots of fun autumnal activities,

bullet journal, Bullet journaling, creativity, Cricut, goal setting, lifestyle, personal growth, Planning and journaling

My Autumn 2024 Bucket List BuJo spread

Posted on Aug 29, 2024Aug 27, 2025 by Laura

Although I’ve finished doing my four traveler’s notebook journals where I documented each season of the year including my bucket list items, I decided to continue making a seasonal bucket list and adding it to a double page spread in my bullet journal as I really enjoy making them. Today I’m sharing my Autumn 2024 list in which I’ve included some seasonal activity favourites and new things to try. I hope my bucket list inspires you to create your own, whether by simple writing them down in your journal or getting creative and adding hand drawn pictures or making stickers like mine which complement the items.

Before I created my Autumn 2024 bucket list, I revisited my autumn 2023 list so I could be sure I wasn’t just repeating last year’s items. I then spent time writing down all the things I love about the season such as seeing the beautiful colours on the trees, spotting autumn visitors at my local nature reserve, making my home warm and cosy and putting out seasonal decor, trying out new comfort food recipes and warm desserts and so on. I also added new activities I would like to try such as making caramel covered apples on sticks and planning out my TV viewing for the next three months so we can have plenty of series to look forward to as we cosy up each evening.

Having made plenty of notes, I turned lots of them into bucket list items on a scrap piece of paper before making stickers for each of them in Cricut. I also used Canva Pro and downloaded images to go with each. For a few of them, I also downloaded mini pictures either using Canva photos or via Google and turned these into little stickers too. Finally, I used Cricut Design Space and Canva to download watercolour leaves to add further decor in the spaces on the spread.

My finished bucket list BuJo spread

Final words…

I’m really pleased with how my pages turned out and I hope you like them too. I won’t be creating TN journals to record my progress but I might stick a few photos in my BuJo weeklies to evidence the items as I tick them off. I hope today’s post has encouraged you to give making a seasonal bucket list a go and I would love to see your creation if you would like to share yours to your own blog or email me at laura.j.jones77@gmail.com

goal setting, life hacks, lifestyle, personal development, personal growth, Setting goals and intentions

Monday Matters: How I’m preparing for the Autumn season this year (2024 edition)

Posted on Aug 26, 2024Aug 25, 2024 by Laura

Over the past week, the weather in Sunderland has cooled down and it’s been quite breezy with a few warmish rain showers. It feels like the end of summer is fast approaching and that we’re quickly heading into the autumn time. My husband reckons there are still some bright and sunny days to come and I shouldn’t pack away my shorts, vest tops and cropped trousers just yet but, although I love a nice bit of sunshine, I certainly won’t miss applying greasy sunscreen to my exposed skin before spending time outdoors and feeling hot and sweaty in bed at night despite only having a thin cotton sheet as a covering. In fact, I’m looking forward to autumn this year and will be planning lots of lovely activities for the season. Today, I thought I’d share how I’m getting ready for autumn 2024 with the intention of giving you some simple ways to prepare for what’s to come and hopefully helping you to look forward to the coming months too.

Home decor

A few months ago, I was looking at the autumnal home decor in Next and saw some really cute pieces. I was very tempted to make a purchase of yet another pumpkin but I resisted as I already have over ten in my collection. However, when I got home, I decided to look at everything on their website, as often, many of the products are not available in store. With 205 items including bedding, kitchenware and tableware, vases, fragrances, lighting, pictures and more, I found it difficult to restrict myself to just one item but I was very restrained and, for click and collect, ordered a sweet little three-dimensional autumn picture with battery operated tiny light up sections.

Cute little light up 3D Hello Autumn sign

Other ways I’ll be getting my home ready in terms of decor include:

putting away a couple of my current mugs and replacing them with my oversized autumn leaves design one (from TKMaxx)
adding our autumn wreath to our front door (I got ours from Lights4Fun)
getting out my various pumpkins to display – I have different sizes and different textures including some ceramic ones, some plush ones in velvet (including a fantastic orange doorstop with sequins on along the grooves) and a lovely handmade crocheted one which I got last year
bring my throws and blankets out of storage to place on the arms our settee and the chair in our living room
airing our thicker quilt to put on the bed as the nights get cooler
choosing a few new candles to scent our home to go with the ‘baked apple pie’ one I purchased late last year (unfortunately, Aggie, our hamster doesn’t react well to stronger smells so I’m having to place them well away from her cage in the hallway)
collecting and using pine cones, dried leaves, stems and branches to create natural centrepieces and arrangements
making my own autumn inspired decor using my collection of watercolours (for this, I will experiment with mixing different earthy and autumnal colours in my palette such as browns, yellows, oranges and deep reds)

Planning some fun activities for the season

Over the past year, starting in autumn 2023, I’ve been creating a seasonal bucket list and then working on a journal to record my experiences. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed creating these but making and finishing the journals has been time consuming and involved quite a lot of expense – I must have gotten through over 50 roller tape glues over the course of the year. So, now that project is almost over, I’ve decided to continue making a bucket list for each season but only record a few of our favourite and completely new experiences in journal pages. I’m yet to create my Autumn 2024 bucket list but here’s last years in case you haven’t seen it already.

Wardrobe changes

Although I have my shorts and crops out at the moment, as the season gets going, I’ll be laundering and putting them all away and getting all of my thin and more cosy knits out. I picked out a few new jumpers and cardigans last year and have already bought a gorgeous pale khaki green batwing jumper with metallic fibres from Love & Roses at Next so I’m pretty much set for the season already!

We’ll also be washing and vacuum packing our thinner summer weight duvet in favour of a higher tog but we won’t put the thickest one on until the really cold nights! And finally, my sandals will be heading into the loft and my walking shoes and ankle boots will be taking their place. I keep my trainers out for my gym sessions but rarely wear them out and about unless I know I’m only going to be walking on solid, open paths where they won’t get soggy or muddy.

Recipes and drinks

As I write this section, I’m enjoying an icy cold J2O Summer Shine to help me hydrate after an intense Clubbercise class. However, in the autumn time, I will crave warming coffees, creamy hot chocolates and tasty mochas. I’m also hoping that I will still be enjoying my new, very low calorie option, mint tea, which I believe only has about 2 calories per cup. I’ve long wished to develop a liking for herbal teas (to ensure I don’t drink too much coffee in the colder months) but it has taken me a long time to find something I can tolerate let alone grow to love!

As well as transitioning mainly to hot drinks, my husband and I will also be swapping light salads for heavier and warming soups, stews, pasta and risottos. Before the autumn season arrives, I like to pick out some online recipes to try using my favourite ingredients. I also like to fill our store cupboard with wholegrain rice and pasta, packets of other healthy grains such as quinoa, freekeh, bulgur wheat and oats, plus tins of pulses such as chickpeas, kidney beans, butterbeans, black beans and lentils. We also tend not to have ice cream when the temperatures drop, opting for warming desserts with lashings of custard such as treacle tart or syrup sponge. I’m also planning on having a go at making a pineapple upside down cake (complete with cherries in each pineapple ring) this year as I remember enjoying the ones my mum used to make when I was a kid. I just need to add it to my bucket list so I don’t forget!

Pumpkin everything?

Personally, I love cooking with the various squashes that are around at this time of year and love trying different varieties (interesting known as winter squashes not autumn!). However, I’m not a fan of the popular PSL (AKA pumpkin spiced latte) or other sweet pumpkin flavoured treats that become available. Also, I don’t want any of the sickly sweet pumpkin scented candles that can be found in abundance at TKMaxx already. I don’t mind the spice element, but I’d rather go for a nice warming cinnamon. What about you? Do you fully embrace pumpkin in sweet stuff or are you glad when they run out of pumpkin spiced stuff at your local Starbucks? Luckily, cinnamon flavoured items can be purchased alongside the popular gingerbread bits and pieces which come out closer to Christmas time so their warmth can be enjoyed in winter too.

Digital screens

Each season, I change the wallpaper on my laptop and my mobile phone. Last year, I remember having a photograph of a squirrel collecting nuts, surrounded by autumn leaves which I’m sure was digitally created but used to make me smile each time I logged into my computer. I’ve seen lots of background images on Canva Pro which I must choose from before my free trial ends. For the phone wallpaper, I usually just Google ‘autumn aesthetic phone screens for android’.

Enjoying the outdoors

As the weather becomes slightly chillier, there’s no need to stay inside with the heating on and complain about how cold it’s becoming. Going for walks in the autumn is, in my opinion, an absolute must, especially when the leaves begin to change to beautiful shades of red, orange, yellow and brown and then start to lace the ground. As long as you remember to layer up so you stay warm and cosy whilst enjoying the stunning scenes, there’s so much that nature has to offer. And if you struggle with cold and pain in your hands when the temperature steadily drops, my husband can recommend the rechargeable hand warmers that you can pick up on Amazon for a small (and very worth it) charge.

As you enjoy the outdoors, why not collect some nature elements to display at home or make art with such as pine cones, jewel-coloured leaves, branches and stems. Google autumn nature crafts and don’t be put off from doing something arty just because it says it for kids!

Final words…

The more preparation you put in prior to the autumn commencing, the more joy you’ll feel and the more exciting opportunities you’ll create. Each season has so much to offer us and rather than engaging in that popular British pastime of complaining about the weather, why not spend your time fully embracing autumn doing activities that you love or have always wanted to try?

Wishing you an amazing autumn,