Category: wellbeing

Posted in mental health, Mindfulness, mindset, psychology, self care, wellbeing, wellness

Monday Matters: 8 ways to instantly boost your mood

Posted on by Laura

Sometimes, no matter how positive you feel when you wake up, particular events, issues, frustrations and even certain people’s attitudes can put a dampener on things and leave you feeling deflated. You probably wish you hadn’t let these parts of your day affect you as much as they have but it’s a natural part of life to experience ups and downs. When low mood strikes, there are a number of ways in which you can help yourself to feel better. Today, I’m sharing 8 tried and tested ideas which I’ve found helpful and I promise none of them include eating a gigantic bar of chocolate or any other highly calorific item!

Get out in nature

If you’ve been following my blog for a while, you’ll know that I’m a big fan of getting out in nature, whether that’s spending some time in my garden, heading to my local woodland park or even going to the beach to walk on the sand or paddle in the sea. It doesn’t have to be for long – just a few minutes of fresh air can make the world of difference to how you feel.

Listen to some upbeat tunes (even better, dance and sing too)

I first wrote about the benefits of listening to music back in 2021 and, as part of the post, I shared a page I’d created in my bullet journal with a mood boosting playlist. Musical taste is incredibly personal but choosing some upbeat songs to boogie, sing and listen along to can put you in a much better frame of mind. Here’s some ideas for uplifting tracks to find on YouTube, Apple Music or whatever happens to be your favourite resource to listen to through headphones or to blast out through your speakers (if it won’t disturb anyone):

  • Can’t Stop The Feeling By Justin Timberlake
  • I Got a Feeling By The Black Eyed Peas
  • Happy By Pharrell Williams
  • 22 By Taylor Swift
  • Walking On Sunshine By Katrina & The Waves
  • Song 2 By Blur
  • Love Shack By B-52s
  • Roar By Katy Perry
  • Sweet Child O’ Mine by Guns N’ Roses
  • Good Feelin’ By Flo Rida
  • Watermelon Sugar By Harry Styles
  • Dance Monkey By Tones And I
  • Groove Is In The Heart By Deee-lite
  • Blinding Lights By The Weeknd
  • Havana By Camila Cabello Feat. Young Thug

Whatever your favourite style of music, jot down an uplifting songs list or create a track list on your device and keep it in a memorable location (either on paper or digitally) to refer to when you need it.

Get moving

On the subject of moving our body, as an alternative to dancing along to your favourite tracks, you could also explore other forms of exercise in a bid to boost your mood. Any type of physical activity that raises your heart rate has been shown to release endorphins in the body. These hormones and neurotransmitters, which have been described as ‘a natural high’, will have you feeling better in minutes. Here’s some fun / invigorating summer time activities to try:

  • Spend some time in your garden pulling weeds, breaking up compacted soil in your borders, cutting your lawn, deadheading faded blooms, pruning bushes and shrubs, checking for hidden pests and watering thirst plants with a heavy watering can.
  • Get your bike out of the garage, dust it off and head to a trail of your choice. I like to go to the coast as it’s a straight stretch of cycle path which is wide enough for if I get the wobbles but if you search ‘easy bike rides near me’ you can explore different options available to you in your locality.
  • Play a game or do a physical activity that you used to enjoy as a kid – frisbee, bouncing a ball off a wall / bat / the ground,
  • Clean and or tidy your desk / room / house, then sit back and enjoy the feeling that comes with a neat and dust free space.
  • Take a brisk walk around the block and see if you can notice anything new or different – maybe someone in your immediate area has painted their fence, changed their car, got a new pet, weeded their driveway etc. Maybe the council has added a new sign, planted some young trees or mown the grass in another street. If you can’t see anything that’s changed, maybe you could think of some changes you would like to make if you were in charge!

Soak up some sunshine

Sunlight is a natural source of Vitamin D which has been scientifically proven to regulate your mood. If it’s a nice day, get your sunglasses and some sun protection on and feel the warmth on your skin. I like to sit on our bench or one of our patio chairs in the garden and close my eyes for some mindful listening to accompany the experience. This is a great way to get into a meditative state as it gives you something to focus on and minimises the change of your mind wandering towards the major or minor irritations I mentioned previously. In the summer, there’s generally lots of daytime sounds whether it’s someone mowing the lawn, children laughing, birds tweeting or even distant traffic noises.

What a video of something cute or funny

Open up YouTube on your phone or computer and search for cute or funny videos of, plus the name of your favourite pet or animal. Anyone who’s been following my blog for a while is likely to know my animal of choice is a Syrian hamster, but I can guarantee that there are videos out there to suit all whether that’s woodland birds, different pets or even more unusual choices like sealions, squirrels, polar bears or hedgehogs.

Dig out your photograph albums

Looking back at old photographs (and/or journals if you do memory keeping like I do) is a great way to bring to mind happy memories of exciting life events, people in your life (past and present) and places you’ve been. And if you’re one of those people who rarely print your images off, why not flick through those on your phone and select some to add to an album later. Taking time on your own to quietly sit and view several years worth of photographs can be very therapeutic, as can sharing them with loved ones either in person or by contacting them via phone, WhatsApp, email or even letter (pretty paper optional!).

Practise gratitude

Grab a piece of paper or your journal and make a list of five small things you’re grateful for in your life right now. Research shows that a consistent gratitude practice has so many health and wellbeing benefits so give it a try starting today and see how it makes you feel. Check out this blog post to learn more.

Make a list of things you love about yourself

Whilst you’ve got a pen and paper to hand, here’s another positive exercise to try. Write a title ‘Things I love about myself’ at the top of the page and then make a list of your best qualities. This could include physical aspects such as your smile, your lovely, long locks, your clear skin and healthy looking nails, your character traits, e.g. kindness, good analytical skills, reliability, optimism and so on, and things you’re really good at like cooking, motivating yourself, helping others, solving problems etc. Once you written as much as you can right now, try displaying your list somewhere so you can refer to it when you need a mood boost, or add to it when something comes to mind.

Inhale an uplifting scent

If you know anything about aromatherapy, you’ll probably be aware that some scents are thought to be uplifting and mood boosting. I have a few little essential oil bottles which I got from the Body Shop in strawberry, raspberry and exotic which I love to inhale at any given opportunity. My scents of choice are fruity smells but below are a list of classic options which I collected from various websites via Google.

  • vanilla
  • peppermint
  • jasmine
  • citrus scents including orange, lemon and grapefruit
  • juicy fruits like peaches, pear and pineapple
  • relaxing scents like lavender, ylang, ylang and chamomile
  • spicy scents such as ginger, cinnamon and clove
  • fresh forest options such as pine and eucalyptus

Of course, it’s important to experiment and see which you prefer (and think about the mood you want to create such as uplifting or relaxing) but these should get you started with that. As you learn more about aromatherapy, you might like to try combining scents to create your perfect mood booster!

Final words…

I hope you’ve found today’s post beneficial and the ideas will motivate you to be pro-active next time you find yourself in a funk or stressed by particular events in your day. If I haven’t shared your favourite way to uplift your mood, or relax when tensions are high, feel free to add it in the comments as it may help someone else to manage their mood in the future along with my ideas.

Thanks for reading and I’ll be back with another wellbeing post very soon,

Posted in Anxiety management, bullet journal, life hacks, lifestyle, mental health, planner lifestyle, wellbeing

Monday Matters: 5 reasons why you should make a packing list for your holiday (AKA vacation)

Posted on by Laura

As my regular readers will know, my husband and I are off on a week’s holiday later in the month. Before we go on any trip, whether it’s a weekend away, a mid week trip or a longer holiday, without fail, I create a packing list in my bullet journal which includes absolutely everything that I plan to take no matter how obvious the items are – I’ll even list the contents of my handbag even though the stuff is already inside. Today, I’m going to share with you my three reasons for making the aforementioned list and why I believe is an essential part of holiday preparation.

It helps you avoid under or over-packing

Before starting my packing list, I spend time thinking carefully about the length of our holiday and how many days worth of clothing I will need. I’ll also think about whether I will need more than one outfit for any of the days or if it’s likely we will be going out for the day and then coming back in the evening and staying in. Finally, I’ll consider whether any items will be re-worn or if, for example, they might have become sweaty if it’s really hot weather. The same process will be applied to my underwear items so I know I have just the right amount of stuff. This helps me avoid over or under packing and usually means that I have the perfect amount of clothing. After careful consideration I will work on my clothing list, writing down exactly how many of items were I need multiples e.g. 15 pairs of socks, 5 bras etc.

It ensures you don’t forget any essentials

There are always a number of items which you absolutely must take on your holiday. For me, this is things like my medication, mobile phone, debit cards and cash, hairbrush and for somewhere hot, sunscreen, a cap and my sunglasses. These would go on my essentials list and are written down first when I create by bullet journal spread. Doing this ensures you don’t forget any essentials – or at least it does if you run through your list before you set off and tick off all of the items!

You can pack methodically in a (relatively) stress free way

In the past, I’ve found packing my bags for departure extremely stressful, even to the point of inducing tears. Creating a packing list makes things much easier and a hell of a lot calmer. By going down your list for each category, you can get each item folded (or rolled) and ready in a collection so all that remains is to decide where it will go in your suitcase or bag.

As part of my list, I also add a ‘last minute’ list which includes things which will be in use at home before travel e.g. my toothbrush, hairbrush and make up, and tasks which need completing before setting off e.g. emptying the kitchen bin, watering our pots in the front and back garden etc.

You can keep your lists to help you next time

As all of my packing lists are written in my bullet journals, I can flick back and find a similar holiday list to help me get started. So, for example, if we’re going down to visit my parents in the summer time, I can look back at last years list and re-write it with some tweaks such as adding new items of clothing, removing bits and pieces that I no longer own etc. This makes things super quick and easy and again contributes to packing being a less stressful event!

It stops you stressing over forgotten items

My husband always says to me in the car to the airport or on our way to our destination “have you remembered anything that you’ve forgotten yet?”. Invariably, my answer is no, unless I forgot to do my last minute check through like I did when we went to my mum and dad’s house last and I forgot my hairdryer as it was in use prior to setting off. In the past, for my husband, the answer was quite regularly “yes” when I replied “have you?” until he realised a list on his phone might be of great help!

As well as preventing you forgetting things (at least minimising the potential), it also means that you don’t have to then go searching for replacements at your destination. This is particularly helpful if you’re going somewhere remote with limited access to shops, if you prefer particular products (e.g. I only use vegan cosmetics and toiletries) or if you’re going abroad somewhere (especially if you don’t speak the language). It might not be the end of the world if you forget non-essential items but it often causes some form of inconvenience at least.

My packing list for this month’s holiday

There are lots of packing lists examples available online and you can even purchase PDF versions, but personally, I prefer writing my own from scratch for each holiday. This means it’s completely personal to me and relevant to the particular destination, season and length of time I’m away for. I also take my list with me in my bullet journal when I go so that I can do a quick whizz through before we go home so I can check I’ve repacked everything. Below is my packing list for our holiday to Wales. It’s still a work in progress as we’re not heading off yet and I like to take my time with it.

Photo credit: Laura Jones for Keeping It Creative

Final words…

I hope you’ve found today’s blog post useful and can see how creating a packing list, for me, is an essential before travel task which is great for making me much more relaxed and better organised. Drawing up your own personalised list can lead to you feel less stressed and better prepared and I promise you will realise what a worthwhile activity it is. I’d love to know where you think would be the best place to write your list (analogue or digital?) and if you can see the benefits of keeping them in a safe place until your next holiday.

Thanks for reading!

P.S. Some of my readers have messaged me via email and have expressed an interest in dropping a comment or asking a question after reading a particular blog post. Unfortunately, this involves setting up a WordPress account but, luckily, it doesn’t take long and, once created, you can leave comments on any blog posts (from bloggers who use WordPress) which spark your interest. Also, you don’t need to be a blogger to set up account either. I hope this helps! I plan to paste this into each of my posts in future but have put it in post script so my regular readers and fellow bloggers can ignore!

Posted in goal setting, journalling, life hacks, lifestyle, meditation, Mindfulness, mindset, self care, Setting goals and intentions, wellbeing, wellness

Monday Matters: Discovering joy in every season of the year using The Happiness Year by Tara Ward

Posted on by Laura

A few months ago, I was looking in the health and wellbeing section at Waterstones and came upon a beautifully illustrated book about finding joy throughout the year by trying out different seasonal activities. At the time, I didn’t purchase it, but I regretted my decision so I ordered it from an online retailer. When it arrived, I added it to the bookcase in my craft room as I was already in the process of reading about 8 different books which is a few too many even by my standards. I pulled it out a few days ago and there are some lovely activities inside in the section which I started with – Spring. I tried out the first exercise this morning and really enjoyed it so I thought I would give a short summary of the book and share that first prompt with you today.

The Happiness Year: How to Find Joy In Every Season by Tara Ward

In the introductory section of the book, Tara discusses the aims of The Happiness Year and also talks about the emotion of happiness and the four positive chemicals that are released into your body when you’re happy – dopamine, oxytocin, serotonin and endorphins (referred to as DOSE throughout the book). She then goes on to explain how to use and enjoy the book.

The remainder of the book is split into four sections – Spring, Summer, Autumn and Winter and there are a collection of exercises provided in each which you can pick and choose from. In combination, they promise to help you in an holistic way – physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Personally, I think I will probably try out all of the different activities and see which I prefer and benefit from the most.

Included within the book, there are journalling and brainstorming activities, meditations, physical exercises, goal setting and planning tasks, plus many more to explore and enjoy. You are also invited to complete them in a way that feels comfortable for you, taking into account individual differences and preferences.

So far, I’ve only read the Spring chapter in depth but I’ve had a good flick through all of the book and I can already see there are many exercises that will appeal.

Exploring your thoughts, feelings and ideas about Spring

As I said earlier, I completed the first activity this morning and I enjoyed it so much that I felt compelled to share it with you. I think this exercise would work well for each of the four seasons, not just Spring. Here’s a step by step explanation of what to do:

  • Take an A4 piece of paper and place it in front of you
  • Write the word SPRING in large letters at the bottom of the page
  • Close your eyes and take three deep, comfortable breaths to focus you in the present moment
  • Open your eyes and look at the word
  • What comes to mind when you think of Spring?
  • Write down everything which comes up for you
  • When you’ve run out of ideas, close your eyes again, breathe deeply and continue thinking about the season
  • Note down any further ideas or images which come to mind
  • When you feel you’ve finished, look over your sheet
  • What jumps out at you the most? Circle any words or phrases which particularly resonate or feel important to you. Are then any surprises?
  • What is the overriding emotion when you look at your words? Write that emotion or emotions at the top of the page.
  • Look through the words and make a list of those which generate feelings of happiness.

I hope you found this a helpful exercise and it reminded you about all of the lovely things which happen in the Springtime. I’ve included my sheet below, how does it compare to yours?

Photo credit: Laura Jones for Keeping It Creative

Final words…

If you enjoy mindful activities such as journalling, setting intentions, exploring the world using your five senses, breathwork, meditation and appreciating the simple things in life, I would definitely recommend checking out The Happiness Year. The book will help you find ways to appreciate and make the most of all of the things that each season has to offer you. You’ll also find a range of self care activities to increase your happiness levels by releasing a good ‘DOSE’ of positive chemicals. Let me know if you try the exercise outlined above and how it made you feel.

Posted in Bullet journaling, goal setting, life hacks, lifestyle, Planning and journaling, Setting goals and intentions, wellbeing

Monday Matters: A guide to creating your own seasonal bucket list for Spring 2024

Posted on by Laura

For Autumn 2023 and Winter 23/24, I have thoroughly enjoyed and benefitted from creating my own personalised bucket lists and adding my seasonal ideas to a two page spread in my bullet journal for inspiration and reference. For each of the seasons, I also handmade and stitched a pretty TN wide size notebook to go in my TN journal where I added photographs, text, a variety of stickers, ephemera and tip ins to record my achievements over the months. I’ve found the bucket lists a great way to plan in some interesting and exciting activities, set some goals and ensure my husband and I make the most of each season of the year. So, today, I’m sharing my bucket list for Spring 2024, in the hope that you will be inspired to create your own and live your life to the full.

What is a bucket list?

A bucket list is a number of items that a person would like to achieve, experience or bring into fruition over a given time frame. This could be over a lifetime, a year, or, as with mine, during a specific season. There are many benefits of creating and working towards things on your bucket list including:

  • Helping you to reflect on what is important to you as an individual and what you really want from life
  • Offers you a number of things to look forward to over the chosen time frame, increases your excitement levels
  • Providing you with a visual reminder and the focus and motivation you need to move towards your goals
  • Creating a sense of accomplishment
  • Pushes you out of your comfort zone which is really good for your personal growth

You can create one which is just for you, or you could make plans with your partner, a close friend or even sit down as a family to come up with some ideas together.

My Spring 2024 Bucket List

Here’s my bucket list for this season in my bullet journal. The words and images were all made into stickers using Cricut Design Space and I’m really pleased with how it turned out. I’ve included a little ceramic bunny I purchased, the wooden egg which I got in the Hobbycraft sale last year and the jigsaw I picked out which I can’t wait to get started with. I’m yet to make the handstitched notebook but I have lots of floral papers which will be suitable for the cover.

Photo credit: Laura Jones for Keeping It Creative

So, how do I get started with my Spring seasonal bucket list?

There’s plenty of seasonal bucket list inspiration online but I like to spend some time in quiet contemplation first. That way, what I add to my list is all about what I want rather than what others believe would make a good Springtime.

Consider your core values and what really matters – Spend some time thinking about what is most important to you in your life or what you wish to focus on more. You might want more fun and adventure, better balance between work, rest and play, opportunities to develop your creativity, new experiences or the chance to learn a new skill. You might want to experiment more in the kitchen, spend lots of time in nature or plan some different day trips to places in your local area. Living in alignment with your personal values is key to improved psychological wellbeing which includes your general happiness levels and outlook.

Think about the particular season you are making plans for – consider the weather associated with Springtime and any particular holidays or events which take place during the season. So, for example, in Spring, the temperature is starting to rise during the day but the evenings are still pretty cool. In Britain, the weather can be calm and dry, but, showers are also pretty common and it can often be a bit breezy. Buds and blossom begin to appear and early blooms such as snowdrops, crocuses, iris and daffodils begin to pop up in the flower beds. Spring is also the time for observing and listening to wildlife too. Bumblebees and butterflies start to make an appearance and hibernating animals such as bats and hedgehogs can be seen from dusk into the night. You might find frogspawn in ponds and watch tiny froglets appear in a matter of weeks. Birds are noisier and livelier as they pair off and start to nest and spring visitors such as swifts, swallows and house martins begin to arrive.

Mother’s Day and Easter both fall in the Springtime and there are, of course, a few Bank Holidays to look forward to. And if you want to find out about events specific to your town or city this website is a great source of information.

Write down every idea that comes to mind – Make a list of potential ideas, big and small, inexpensive and more costly, time consuming and quick. This could include a visit to Pinterest and other sites to look at bucket list ideas and inspirational images.

Refine your list – Having written a long list, it’s time to decide which items are the best fit for your values and priorities. Try to choose some activities which you enjoy each year and are somewhat traditional, but also make sure you include some which are completely new and will push you out of your comfort zone.

Choose a place to store your list – Having a finalised record of your bucket list is important if you want your aspirations to become a reality. Depending on your personal preferences, you might choose to put your list in your planner or journal or have a digital document in Notion of Microsoft Word. There’s even a website and online community dedicated to bucket lists! And, if you relish every opportunity to get creative, like I do, you can make a physical copy of your list with fancy lettering, motivational phrases, sketches, stickers and inspirational images. You might even find you’re excited to share it with your friends and family too.

Remember things can change – Your finished bucket list is a set of items that you hope to experience this Spring but, it’s not a list of commitments or things that you must do or achieve over the time period. You may find that priorities or circumstances change and that some of the items become less important or need to be put on hold for another year. You might also learn of some new opportunities as the season progresses which you want to add to your list or replace an item with.

Previous Bucket Lists

I think I’ve previously shared my Autumn and Winter bucket lists but thought readers might like to see them again for examples of the kinds of thing you could add and how you might decorate a spread in your notebook or bullet journal.

I achieved everything on my Autumn one but didn’t get to play in the snow over the Winter time as it was mostly wet and often quite mild. I still included all of the items in my Traveler’s Notebook journal. but I wrote a few lines about the weather and the impact it had on the season.

Photo credit: Laura Jones for Keeping It Creative
Photo credit: Laura Jones for Keeping It Creative

Final words…

Creating a bucket list for the season is a wonderful way to plan in some interesting, fun and different activities for the coming months. I also enjoyed making stickers to go with the items on my list but if you prefer, you could have a go at drawing and colouring in some little pictures instead.

Let me know a couple of items that you want to add to your list for Spring 2024. I’m looking forward to hearing your ideas and hope you thoroughly enjoy creating some new memories.

Posted in compassion, grief, lifestyle, pets, wellbeing

Monday Matters: Tips for coping with pet loss and how to support others through their grief

Posted on by Laura
Photo from a selection on Unsplash

This morning, I’ve been doing a little bit of work on my general blog pages (about me page, FAQs etc.) to check that they’re up to date. When reading my bio on my home page, I noticed that it said that I share my home with my husband and my little hamster Millie. Unfortunately, hamsters only live for up to one to two years of age and she passed away several months ago now. Both of us were upset at our loss and it was sad to see her decline over the last few weeks of her life. To us, she was not just ‘our hamster’, she was a much loved member of the family, and her funny antics and personality provided us with so much joy. Today, I want to share some tips for coping with pet loss, because, whether your pet was small or large, they’re sure to have left a big hole in your life and much sadness. I also want to discuss some ways in which you can support family members or friends who have experienced a recent loss.

Tips for coping when your pet dies

Accept your emotions, feelings and thoughts without judgement

Following your loss, all kinds of strong emotions and feelings may come up. For example, at different times, you might experience sadness, anxiety, disbelief, shock, anger, guilt and regret. You could also find that your thoughts are completely preoccupied with your loss, leaving you unable to think of anything else. Whatever you experience, try to simply be aware of the different emotions, feelings and thoughts as they come and go, accepting them as a normal part of the grieving process. Remember, as well, to be compassionate and kind to yourself in a way that you would be towards a loved one who was experiencing such as loss.

Surround yourself with supportive friends and family

As you come to terms with your loss, it’s good to seek out friends and family members who you know will be supportive, rather than diminishing how you are feeling. This could include someone who has lost a pet in the past or has a cherished pet (or pets) of their own. You might also turn to individuals who are good listeners and often have the ability to make you feel better with their words or gestures.

On the other hand, some people will struggle to understand your intense feelings of sadness and may not offer the empathy you need or could even seem dismissive of the situation. Rather than getting angry, frustrated or upset with them, try to accept that they just don’t get it, brush them off, and find others, possibly outside of your social circle, who do recognise your suffering.

Embrace your memories

Talk and think about fond memories of your pet with family members and understanding friends. Look back over photographs and videos of fun times and reminisce over your own and shared experiences. And if difficult emotions arise, just accept them and know that it’s okay to be upset.

We have a cute video of Millie playing in her digging tower where we are waiting in anticipation of her emerging out of the bottom covered in wood-shavings. We never tire of watching her appear, and the video even has audio of me encouraging her to dig her way out! We also have photos of many of our hamsters when they were little babies and some moments where they’re enjoying a snack or exploring. Most of them are a little on the blurry side as they very rarely stay still but they’re still lovely reminders of our furry friends throughout the years and we have treasured memories of each and every one of them.

Try seeking out online or in person support

There are a range of support groups available online and this includes websites specifically dedicated to pet loss such as the Blue Cross organisation which has a Facebook community and trained volunteers you can speak with. You can also seek the help of a therapist who can offer counselling and coping strategies.

I’ve been a part of the ‘hamsters’ group on Facebook for many years now. It has over 6K members and there’s always someone on there to offer a kind word following the loss of your furry friend or when you need some emotional support regarding difficult decisions with regard to ailing hamsters.

Practice self-care as you mourn your loss

Although it might be difficult, try to look after yourself as best you can during your period of mourning. This can include eating a balanced diet, getting some exercise each day, trying to ensure you get a good night’s sleep, keeping up with basic hygiene and even pampering yourself a little such as with a massage, manicure, bubble bath or a new haircut.

Try journalling

Journalling about your pet and your loss can be a great way to explore how you are feeling and is also a lovely way to help you remember how unique and special they were. You could do some free writing to explore your thoughts but, if you’re unsure what to write, this website has some great journalling prompts to choose from.

Don’t rush to replace your pet

Although it might be tempting to get another pet straight away, it is usually better to mourn your old pet first and wait until you are emotionally ready to welcome a new animal into your home. There’s no right time to get a new pet, but experts suggest that you should wait until you have worked through your grief adequately enough to be able to look forward to a new addition rather than still be in the process of deeply mourning your loss.

Ways to support someone who has recently lost their pet

  1. Send a sorry for your loss card to let them know that you care and are thinking about them.
  2. Be a good listener when they talk about their feelings, emotions and ways in which their loss is affecting them. Think about supportive things you might say in reply – maybe that you were sorry to hear about x, or that your here for them if they want to talk. Also, knowing what not to say is just as important. Phrases such as ‘he was old anyway’, ‘she’s in a better place now’ or ‘you can get another one’ might be well meaning but they’re also dismissive at the same time.
  3. Let them know that it’s normal to be upset and it is okay to cry, feel sad or even become lonely or a little depressed. It’s important to allow time to grieve and heal – and it takes as long as it takes.
  4. Remind them to be self-compassionate and encourage them to look after their basic needs. You could also offer support with this such as getting some shopping in for them, making a nutritious meal to take around or doing some errands. Ask them if there’s anything you can do and make suggestions so that they know that the offer off help isn’t just something to say.
  5. Check in with them regularly after your initial conversation. Text or phone them to ask them how they are getting on and if they need anything.
  6. Help them to seek out further support by looking into dedicated websites for pet loss or by finding leaflets or books on the topic. Some resources are specifically aimed at particular pet owners, for example The Kennel Club offers advice on coping with losing your dog.

Final words…

If you have found and are reading today’s blog post because your pet has recently died, I am so very sorry for your loss. Losing a beloved pet can be a very difficult time as they are very much a part of the family. I hope you find the above suggestions useful and they help you to cope with your grief. Remember that, if needed, there are therapists available who are trained to support people through any type of grief, including pet loss, and they will help you talk through your feelings, normalise your emotions and any difficulties you are experiencing and offer coping strategies.