Category: Mindfulness

Posted in mental health, Mindfulness, Planning and journaling, wellbeing, wellness

Why I’m avoiding Pinterest this month and what I’m doing instead

Posted on by Laura
Pinterest – banned for September!

I love Pinterest and find it a great source of inspiration and advice for my professional and personal life. I spend huge amounts of time pinning ideas to boards, organising my collections of pins and generally poring over infographics and beautiful images. However, with attractive images and information, for me, comes a huge desire for continual self improvement and feeling like I need to have it all. And this is the bit that I struggle with and ultimately why I’m taking time out from pinning and Pinterest this month.

Self improvement, in a nutshell, is the process of making yourself a better and more knowledgeable person. It’s something I spend a lot of time thinking about and planning for. But, one of the big problems for me is, that I end up with information overload from social media and find so many ways to ‘grow’ myself that I lose sight of what I actually want right now and become unhealthily obsessed with making massive changes and improvements.

What I really need to do, is simplify and think about my current goals and the small steps I might take in order to go about achieving them. But with Pinterest, and other social media platforms if I’m honest, I see stunning images and tempting ideas and basically, I want it all. A minimalist and clutter free home which is welcoming to anyone and always tidy. A stunning garden without a single weed or patch of unraked soil. Beautiful brush lettering that just flows naturally from my hand. A neat and ordered bullet journal with no mistakes or Tippex on the pages. A blog and a handmade business that everyone’s reading and talking about. Perfect, glossy hair that has that ‘just been to the hairdressers’ bounce. Skilfully applied ‘flawless’ make up. The list goes on, and on, and on.

So, for this month, I’m taking a step back. I’m reassessing my goals and thinking carefully about how I’m going to work towards achieving them. And for this, the only resources I need, are my vision board that I created back in January (which you can see here if you haven’t seen it already), my inspirational brand image board for my business (click here if you want to see) and a couple of goal related collections I made in my BuJo. By looking daily at my vision for this year and analysing what I actually want right now from my life, I hopefully won’t be distracted by all of the other stuff. This should help increase my productivity and in turn my achievements instead of creating total overwhelm and the feeling of personal dissatisfaction that often comes with creating an unachievable ideal.

I’m not going to totally avoid social media this month as I do like to know what’s going on in the world but I’m hoping my efforts to curb my tech time will help in some way. By writing my intention here to you all, I’m also hoping that my plan sticks and that I benefit from it, even if it’s just in some small way.

Have you ever given yourself some much needed time away from social media? How did it work for you. Let me know in the comments and wish me luck!

Bye for now, Laura xx

Posted in mental health, Mindfulness, wellbeing, wellness

There’s no such word as can’t!

Posted on by Laura

So, let’s have a show of hands. Who looked at this title and thought back to their childhood and what they were told by well meaning parents each time they uttered words about not being able to do something? Who has heard themselves using this very phrase as an adult when a small person in their life has said, in an exasperated tone ‘but I can’t do it!’? Who also knows, that as an adult, they’ve found themselves many times to be the one making the ‘I can’t’ statement e.g. I can’t draw, I can’t swim, I can’t cook etc? So, is the term ‘can’t’ a superfluous word which should be removed from our dictionaries at once, or, more likely, do we need to think about our use of it and assess whether this is actually what we mean? Personally, I think the latter is likely to be favoured by most of you, but have you ever considered why?

The reason for this particular blog post is related to an idea from a compassion group which I’m currently signed up to and which I attend each Wednesday afternoon. It’s part of a therapeutic service offered by my local wellbeing team and was suggested by a therapist I was seeing on a one-to-one basis. There are 9 of us who attend and work alongside two therapists who run the group. Last week, we were talking about our experiences of doing a simple meditative breathing exercise at home which we had been asked to do for homework each day. One of the group members said, when sharing her thoughts, “I can do the rhythm of breathing here but I can’t do it at home”. Although this was met with nods from a number of the group, the response from one of the therapists was very different. She didn’t say ‘there’s no such word as can’t’. What she said was, that we all need to be mindful of using the word can’t in this kind of situation as an I can’t mentality can hinder self compassion, feelings of self worth and all of the other things that our group is all about. It’s this alternative way of thinking which I believe holds an important message for us all, but particularly those of us who struggle at time with our mental health.

You might be thinking that there are some things that you simply can’t do. An example here could be, I can’t fly. I’m not blessed with the physical make up which enables an ability to fly i.e. wings, so therefore this statement is true and factually accurate. You would of course, be correct in this case. However, if I share another ‘I can’t’ which I myself am a frequent user of ‘I can’t draw’ then the same logic cannot be applied because I am capable of drawing but what I actually mean is I’m not particularly gifted in this area.

Changing this mentality a little further though, can mean re-phrasing our utterances more carefully so as to give them an even more positive tone involving much more self compassion. If, as in the examples above, you aspire to be better at something, you could change what you say to accept where you are now but also where you would like to be in the future. So “I can’t do soothing rhythm breathing at home” would be rephrased as “I’m finding it difficult at the moment to do the breathing at home but I’m hopeful I will get better with practise”. In the same way, “I can’t draw” would become something more like “I find drawing quite difficult at moment but I’m working hard to develop my skills and techniques and I’m getting better with practise”.

I’m sure you can think of many examples of times that you’ve been a victim of the ‘I can’t’ mentality and there will be many reasons for this such as fear, lack of self confidence, feelings of failure or inadequacy. But, if we think carefully before we use self deprecating phrases then we can set our minds free from this way of thinking about ourselves in order to try to become more loving, compassionate and kind towards ourselves.

Accepting who we are, celebrating our achievements, letting go of our perceived failures and seeing ourselves as a work in progress with strengths and areas for improvement, we can stop with the negative self talk and hopefully feel better about ourselves and our lives.

I hope what I’ve said here makes sense and that it has at least made you think about how you talk about yourself to others. If you have any other hints or tips about self compassion, I would love it if you shared them in the comments. Also, let me know if there are any “I can’ts” that you find yourself particularly struggle with and find yourself beating yourself up with.

Until next time, stay strong, positive and kind towards yourself.

Much love, Laura xx

Posted in mental health, Mindfulness, Planning and journaling, wellbeing, wellness

Currently… a little update on what’s going on for me in July 2019

Posted on by Laura
It was so hot, we needed lots of sun cream and had to stroll round slowly looking at all of the tiny ducklings.

I’ve been absent from my blog for a while due to some personal issues that I needed to focus on but I’m now back, and getting fully on top of my game. So, I thought I’d post a little update on me now I’m in productive mode and enjoying life.

currently loving:

… our new wildlife pond. My husband, Michael, has done a great job on it and even though it is only dinky, we already have some resident water snails! The birds love it too and can regularly be seen drinking from it after hopping around our wonderfully bright and colourful garden. It’s very much a work in progress but we’re hoping to get some frogs in there soon (especially as next door have a similar pond and they might come visit ours!).

currently reading:

… a wonderful self care book from The Blurt Foundation founder, Jane Hardy. I’m using it as my current Miracle Morning text and using one of my Mildliners to highlight key points and ideas to help me improve my mental health by looking after myself better. I can already list the positive effects it’s had and there’s so many ideas for bullet journal spreads and things to implement.

The Self-Care Project is for those who have been feeling off-kilter for a while but have not been able to put the finger on the ‘why’. It is a no-nonsense, practical journey to help you do just that. It’ll walk you through the case for self-care (why it’s so darn important), why it isn’t selfish at all, help you explore what self-care means for you, what your obstacles might be and provide advice on how to chisel out daily space for self-care in a practical, achievable and realistic way.

Jane HARDY, founder and CEO of THE blurt foundation
Lots of great information in here if you’re interested in improving your self care habits

currently making:

projects from Daphne’s Diary magazine. This bird décor has been on my to go list for a few weeks now and I finally got it made. Couldn’t decide where to hang it so it’s currently attached to the knob of our under stairs cupboard where it get lots of light from our front door.

So cute!

currently celebrating:

… completing my two classes at The Recovery College. I did a course on Emotional Resilience in the Spring Term and then did a Beginners Tai Chi class in the Summer Term. The college is for anyone who is living with mental health issues such as anxiety and depression.

The Recovery College leaflet resting on my new Scribbles bullet journal notebook!

currently planning:

… how my niece Lexi and I will celebrate our birthdays next month. She was born on the same day as me (3rd August) and she will be turning 8, whereas I will be turning slightly older! Hopefully we’ll have glorious sunshine like today.

currently feeling:

… extremely motivated and as though I want to do it all in order to make up for lost time when I was unwell. This totally goes against the teachings of the self care book so I’m trying really hard to stick to a routine in which I plan some shop work, some household chores, a bit of gardening and at least 30 mins of relaxation.

Over to you…

I’d love it if you dropped me a comment about what you’re currently up to this month or what you have planned for August 2019. And don’t forget to raise a glass on the 3rd of next month (I’m sure you don’t need an excuse but I’m giving you one anyway!).

Posted in mental health, Mindfulness, wellbeing, wellness

The Benefits of Drawing as a Mindfulness Activity (a guest post by Emma from Invaluable)

Posted on by Laura

Today’s blog post is by guest blogger Emma from Invaluable who writes about the many health benefits of drawing and sketching. She includes a link to a related infographic with further detail and an opportunity to download a printable checklist of ideas and inspiration which you can stick in your sketch book or journal.

You don’t have to be a Leonardo da Vinci to reap the benefits of creating art. Artistic activities like journaling, crafting, and writing host a slew of benefits that many aren’t aware of, and drawing in particular has a variety of health and physical benefits. Drawing is a great activity for mindfulness, a way to reduce anxiety and let your brain focus on the task at hand while blocking out all other distractions and triggers. Next time you have the urge to sketch, instead of critiquing your own and focusing on improving skills, let yourself get lost in the activity and reap the endless benefits it has on our mind, body, and soul.

Drawing helps increase creativity. This is one of the reasons it’s highly recommended for children as the creation of vivid imagery forces us to use our imagination and in turn develops important areas of the brain.

Drawing improves memory. Drawing is an important activity for those with Alzheimer’s disease. It helps boost recalling skills and sharpen the minds through imaginative thinking.

Drawing improves communication. Drawing forces us to communicate through images, often without words, and this way of expressing inner thoughts and feelings often helps those who are shy or have certain disabilities.

Drawing helps relieve stress. Life is complicated, and an activity like drawing helps to relax from everyday demands. It’s a release, where many can temporarily exit the world of worries and focus on something more desirable.

Drawing increases our emotional intelligence. By enabling one’s emotions to be emitted through art, we in turn can have a better grasp on our feelings.

Sketching can also help you be more observant and improve your senses. Clearly, there are ample health benefits to drawing, listed above. Invaluable created a neat infographic that outlines all the science-backed benefits of sketching, and how we can use the practice to help with emotions we feel throughout our daily activities. It’s something anyone, even the most novice of crafters, can reap the benefits of, so use the visual printable for inspiration next time you’re willing to give it a try.

I hope you enjoyed reading about the benefits of mindful drawing and are keen to try out some of the ideas yourself. Let me know your thoughts in the comments below.

Posted in Mindfulness

Applying mindfulness techniques to chores – can ironing become a pleasure?

Posted on by Laura

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neatly pressed and looking pretty

Yesterday, I started a mindfulness class. It’s a free eight week course designed to be an introduction to the core techniques and is provided my the Wellbeing service where I live. I signed up back in November and got a place in January so didn’t have to wait too long. I found the class a wonderful experience and can’t wait to learn more next week.

So, what’s this mindfulness thing all about?

In brief, mindfulness is all about becoming more aware of the present moment focusing on the here and now rather than the past or the future. It’s been scientifically proven to help our mental wellbeing, as long as you practise it regularly. If you want to read more about mindfulness and the benefits, click here to be taken to current NHS information and guidance: https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/stress-anxiety-depression/mindfulness/

In the class, we did a variety of meditations and techniques including what I shall call ‘the grape experience’. We were given one single grape each and asked to hold in our hand. We were then guided to experience it as though we had never seen a grape before using our 5 senses. So, we looked at it, from all angles, felt it (the skin, the temperature, the texture etc) smelt it (both in our hand and later in our mouths), explored it in our mouths (by rolling it around, testing it with our teeth etc) and then eventually bit into it and experienced taste and heard the sound it made as we chewed.

Now, you might be thinking, who’s got time to eat like that every day, or, alternatively, you could be questioning, quite rightly, what on earth grapes have to do with ironing. But, bear with me! Techniques like this, a simple example of mindful eating, show us how much we take for granted in our every day lives and all of the wonderful experiences we actually have and rarely savour. I, for one, am one of those people who regularly eat at the speed of lightening, whilst thinking about all of the other tasks I need to get done before my husband gets home from work.

Talking of tasks, one of today’s, which I seem to keep putting off, is the big pile of ironing currently residing in a basket in my spare room. I see it every time I go in there and my first thought ranges from ‘I really must get that ironing done soon’ to ‘arggghh, I’m such a domestic slattern’. So, thinking about what I’d learnt in yesterday’s class, I set about doing MINDFUL IRONING!!!

So, using my knowledge about mindfulness, limited so far to two hours of work and experience, here’s a summary of some of what I did in order to be more present:

  • listened to the sounds of the tap filling the little reservoir in the iron and watched it fill.
  • felt the different textures and temperatures of the materials which make up the ironing board and focused on the weight and strength required for the task of erecting the board on my kitchen floor.
  • listened to the various popping noises and the sound of the water heating up after I plugged in and turned on the iron.
  • examined the textures of the different fabrics of the clothes.
  • observed the creases disappearing and the steam coming from the iron as it glided over the items
  • watched, felt and sniffed the steam as it rose from the iron
  • marvelled at the science behind it all!

And do you know, I actually found the experience of ironing that big pile of clothes to be calming and relaxing and I even started to enjoy myself. The items were pressed and folded carefully in no time and I reckon I might even look forward to what I consider to be a boring and time consuming chore in the future. And wouldn’t that be amazing, if every chore felt like a pleasant experience and one which didn’t fill us with dread or boredom?

I really do recommend you try this technique even if you’ve never tried mindfulness before. How about some mindful washing up or mindful showering? Let me know in the comments if you have a go and what you thought of the experience. And even if you’re feeling cynical about it, give it a try, you never know, it might just change your approach to doing chores and improve your day!

Thanks for reading, and happy ironing!

Laura xx