Category: Bipolar disorder

Posted in Bipolar disorder, mental health, mental illness, physical health, relationships, wellbeing, wellness

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly of Hypomania in Bipolar Disorder, including my personal experience

Posted on by Laura

Right now, I’m going through a period of hypomania as part of my bipolar disorder. It seems to have been brought on by Covid-19 because, despite feeling awful physically, my mind was racing and I was getting less than 4 hours sleep in total. Desperately craving some calm to help myself recover from my temporary illness, I turned to a packet containing medication I was given when I was getting used to my bipolar meds namely Diazepam. I thought as I recovered from the virus, things would settle down but so far, as I write this post, they haven’t. I’m trying desperately to do mindful activities to help myself get back to a stable state (what I would usually describe as my ‘normal’) but it’s proving difficult and I’m worrying that I’m going to get worse.

As part of my hypomanic episode, I’ve got literally hundreds of ideas for blog posts, creative pursuits, ways to improve my life and things I absolutely need to start doing. In some ways this is good as, before Christmas, I was struggling with tiredness and didn’t want to do as much with my day and worries that I was becoming depressed filled my mind. However, being ‘high’ means I’m constantly adding to my to do list (or my ‘must do’ list as it feels) and I find myself working on ‘projects’ until late evening and not wanting to stop. And then, surprise surprise, my mind is full of stuff and I’m struggling to switch off when my husband and I settle down to watch TV and I’m finding sleep just will not come.

My husband is still feeling tired from Covid and by the end of the working day, he’s exhausted and finding it difficult to listen and pay attention to my constant witterings. You see, when my mind is full of thoughts and ideas, I get verbal diarrhoea which is not good news for me or my husband – I can’t stop talking and I talk so fast that he can’t keep up. Even my text messages become long and waffly! And if my husband asks a question that has already been answered or he’s failed to compute something I’ve said, I’ll become irritated and short with him.

Talking of being irritated. I’m getting annoyed with all kinds of people and things. A slow driver in front of me on the way to the supermarket. Someone who doesn’t say thanks when I let them pull out. Ink on my hand because of being a leftie. The queue at the post office meaning I have to wait to collect my Amazon order. Having a headache because I’ve failed to drink enough water during the day. The list goes on, and on, and on!

I’ve also noticed that I’m buying more ‘stuff’ in a bid to improve my life. Luckily, I don’t struggle with mania (as I have bipolar 2) so I won’t make huge purchases like a brand new car or an expensive holiday, but things become much more attractive when I’m high. I was in TKMaxx a few days ago, and the more I looked around, the more I wanted things and so I made my purchases (a new pen pot, a cute bird mobile phone holder and 2 gorgeous sky blue matching chopping boards) and swiftly left the shop. My husband will never say no to something that I really want and it makes me feel guilty afterwards when I’m back to my ‘normal’ stable self and our expenses for the month are way more than usual.

These are a few of the difficulties I face which could be described as ‘bad’, but what about the ugly? By ugly, I don’t of course, mean that I turn into a grotesque monster who people can’t stand to look at. I’m really referring to the effects that hypomania can have on character, traits or behaviour. For example, I can have a short temper and might raise my voice to my husband in frustration for being too slow to answer a question, forgetting something, not getting ready to go out fast enough or for asking me to repeat something I’ve said (when talking at speed and not stopping). I might also make comments about someone that I would consider to be nasty at any other time. Or my inflated ego might make me believe that I’m superior to others and that I could do a better job than them. Although I may or may not say things out loud, I don’t want to be someone who voices or thinks horrible things.

In the past, when I was on a high dose of antidepressants and no mood stabiliser, I would sometimes believe I was better than every teacher in the school and that they weren’t as dedicated as me because they took a proper lunchbreak or left before the school closed at 6pm. I would also often speak in a way which to others, might sound like I was full of my own self-importance. Then, I would rush around trying to do everything at once in a bid to maintain the illusion that I was the best! Needless to say, after trying to keep going and going like a Duracell Bunny, I would inevitably crash and either become physically unwell, mentally exhausted or depressed.

Before my diagnosis, I would go through lengthy periods of depression where I had no confidence in myself and got anxious and cried on a daily basis. I also sought reassurance from my husband constantly. However, when going through a period of hypomania, I genuinely believed that I didn’t need anyone’s help and support and that I no longer needed a husband / family / friends for encouragement, support or just to be there. Especially as everyone and everything seemed to irritate or anger me.

Over the years, I’ve learn to apply strategies to calm myself down and the medication I take helps immensely. However, I will never be cured so I am learning to live with my relatively recently diagnosed illness (even though I believe I’ve had the condition since my late teens) and my husband is incredibly patient with me and supports me in any way he can. Whether I listen to his advice or not depends on my mood! However, I’m grateful to have found someone so wonderful to share my life with and put up with my changing moods.

Final words…

I’m hoping that today’s post has given you an insight into the effects that hypomania can have on an individual. I believe it’s important for everyone to know a little bit about it as it’s likely that most people will know someone who is bipolar, even if they’re not aware of an individual’s diagnosis. If any of the writing doesn’t make sense, it will be because most of the above was written at 4am on my phone whilst I sat downstairs frustrated that my mind wouldn’t rest!

It’s taken me at least a week to finish and publish the above and I’m pleased to say that things are starting to settle down. I’m no longer taking diazepam for sleep and my mind has started to calm down a little. I still have lots of ideas and projects but I’m trying to make sure I only work on those which add value to my life. I’m also adopting the done is better than perfect way of doing things. Hopefully, I’ll continue to head in the right direction towards ‘stable’ a term I’m trying to use to describe my state rather than ‘normal’.

If you would like to know more about bipolar disorder and how it affects individuals or you suspect a love one may have the condition, the NHS website has pages of really useful information, including more detail about its presentation . Although symptoms different from person to person, there are set list of signs which are likely to be visible.

Thanks for reading!

Posted in Anxiety management, Bipolar disorder, compassion, depression management, grief, life hacks, mental health, productivity, Uncategorized, wellbeing

Monday Matters: How writing a ‘done list’ can improve your wellbeing during periods of physical and/or mental illness

Posted on by Laura

Welcome to my first blog post of 2025. Happy New Year to you all, and a special hello to my new followers! I hope you had a wonderful Christmas and are excited for what this year will bring.

My husband and I both enjoyed the festive period, which this year (make that last year!) was a double celebration as my brother and his partner got married a few days after Santa had been. The wedding was a joyous occasion and a great a chance to chat with family I hadn’t seen in a while too.

Whilst on the way back home, and with my husband doing the driving, I made the most of being in the passenger seat by reflecting on 2024 and thinking about what I would like to achieve in 2025. I also started to mentally compose a to-do list full of chores and more pleasurable activities to make the most of the remaining three days of the holiday. Little did I know that something would scupper my plans…

Bloody COVID-19 strikes again!

By the time we got back, we both had a bit of a sore throat, which I assumed was just a bit of dehydration from the long car journey. By New Year’s Eve, we felt absolutely dreadful, and so my husband did a test (just in case), and I’m sure you can all guess how that turned out! Needless to say, we’ve barely had the energy for basic self care, nevermind any chores, fun activities or creative pursuits.

We did, however, manage to  psych ourselves up enough to take a quick shower each day, despite how exhausted we were and, despite the fact that the powerful water raining down and massaging in my shampoo and conditioner brought actual pain to my scalp! – random covid symptom or what?????? And I’m so glad we did because this idea for a blog post was born – in fact, some of my best content and general epiphanies come to me whilst showering (anyone else??). 

Basically, I was busy thinking about how annoying it was that I was too exhausted to do anything and that being ill was a giant waste of time, and then I recalled that during my worst bipolar depressions, I still achieved a few things each day and tried my best to be kind to myself and celebrate small wins. To help me do this, I created something that I call a ‘done list’ and, although my illness was physical rather than mental on this occasion, I realised the same technique could be used to make myself feel better.

As everyone goes through ups and downs in life, I thought I’d share how my done list works. You might not need to apply the technique now, but it’s a lovely, self compassionate activity which you can store in your physical or metaphorical toolbox to use when needed such as when you’re sick or struggling with low mood. It can also be used when you’re not feeling under the weather, as a celebration of how productive you’ve been in general or as you work towards your goals for the week / month / year and so on.

In fact, as I sat on the sofa (on day 3 of COVID-19), soothing my throat with a warm drink, I actually started mentally creating one to help my husband and I feel a sense of achievement because I realised we actually did something that day despite feeling like crap.

So what’s a done list?

A done list, as the name suggests, is basically a list of things you’ve achieved that hour / day / week / fortnight / month / different time frame of your choosing, which can be tailored to how you’re feeling – both physically and mentally. So, for example, your list could look something like this:

Today’s done list

  • got out of bed (before 10am too!)
  • got dressed
  • brushed my teeth and washed my face
  • planned 3 things to do
  • made and ate a sandwich (even though I didn’t feel hungry)
  • worked on my jigsaw
  • watched TV for 1 hour (and managed to follow the storyline of the drama)

Or, if you’re not feeling too bad (in a bit more pain than usual, or a little tired maybe and not 100%), could include more taxing items such as those found in the list below:

Things I’ve done this week

  • washed the car
  • tidied my craft room
  • decluttered 20 items from craft room!
  • made 3 meals from scratch
  • 5 gentle workouts (2 x 20 mins yoga and 3 x 30 mins Pilates)
  • created a journalling page using my crafting stash

As you can see from the above, you can include super-minute achievements (or what would considered to be when well) or more ambitious ‘done’ items at other times. These ‘done’ tasks make a good record of how you’ve spent your time and can help you realise that, yes, you might be on top form, but you did make some progress or make a dent in your mental to do list (or physical one if you wrote a list when feeling productive and then things changed e.g. illness, upsetting life event, overwhelm etc).

If you’re still at work, but it’s been a struggle not to phone in sick, you could even include things that you achieved as part of your job, like biting your tongue at a comment made by a colleague or being assertive and saying no to your boss or team leader!

What are the main benefits of creating a ‘done list’?

These are the main benefits I’ve found of creating a done list, but you may be able to come up with more:

  • a visual reminder of what you’ve achieved in the chosen timeframe – the smaller the items are, the longer your list can be!
  • boosts your motivation to do more things (be careful not to do too much though as the last thing you want to do is make yourself feel worse)
  • acknowledges your small wins during difficult times

Final words…

I apologise if this is not new content and I’ve already written about a ‘done list’ before – I did trail through my posts in a bid to find out, and couldn’t pinpoint anything but I still have ‘COVID brain’. Hopefully I’ve shared something helpful which has given you a new string to your ‘wellbeing bow’, particularly if you have recurrent issues with your physical or mental health like I do. Doing a ‘done list’ can also be a great record of what you’ve achieved over a period of time, so can be a really useful tool for measuring productivity too. However you use it, I’m pretty sure it’ll make you feel a little more upbeat about things and your lists may even bring a smile to your face at a later date if you keep them in your planner and happen to flip back!

Thank you for reading and I wish you and your loved ones a happy and healthy 2025,

Posted in Bipolar disorder, lifestyle, mental health, Planning and journaling, wellbeing, wellness

Monday Matters: Being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) and tips for coping day-to-day

Posted on by Laura

I was introduced to the highly sensitive personality type several years ago when I started a discussion on the Bipolar UK charity website. My reading since then has helped me learn more about being a HSP and the associated traits and characteristics. Much of my research has resonated and I feel that being sensitive is part of my bipolar disorder and something which requires day-to-day management, particularly during periods of mental illness. So, today, I thought I’d share some of the main signs of being a HSP and discuss ways of managing the condition.

What is a Highly Sensitive Person?

A highly sensitive person (HSP) is an individual who is thought to have an increased or deeper central nervous system sensitivity to physical, emotional and social stimuli. These are normal and perfectly healthy character traits which brings about a number of strengths and challenges for the individual.’ HSPs often excel creatively and can be incredibly empathetic. They also often tend to notice things that others may miss or make connections that many individuals do not see.

The term was coined by psychologist Doctor Elaine Aron in the 1990s and her research has suggested that around 15-20% of the population have the personality type. She is continuing to study Sensory-Processing Sensitivity (SPS) now and as well as having a website dedicated to her findings, she has written a number of books and developed a self-test which can help you decide if you’re a HSP.

Signs you are a Highly Sensitive Person

  • Throughout your childhood, parents or teachers saw you as shy or sensitive.
  • At school, you became extremely anxious when taking part in timed quizzes, tests and exams. This probably caused pressure to perform and might have caused enough stress to make you perform badly or fail to achieve the expected results.
  • As an adult, you try to avoid potentially upsetting or overwhelming situations.
  • You tend to become stressed or overwhelmed when you have lots to do.
  • You’re generally really good at reading the emotions of others (even those you’ve never met before) e.g. when you walk into a room, you can sense the atmosphere and are able to use subtleties such as facial expressions, body language and tone of voice to establish how individuals are feeling.
  • After a really busy or long day, you find yourself desperate for some quiet/alone time to lower your stimulation levels, soothe your senses and to help you relax and recharge
  • Unexpected or loud noises really startle you and you may consider yourself to be ‘jumpy’ in general
  • You’re a deep thinker and spend a lot of time ‘in your head’ reflecting on anything and everything. This also means you are often prone to negative thinking and rumination (going over and over things in your head).
  • You always choose your clothing super carefully. Rough or restrictive items irritate you. For example, I can’t stand anything with a high neckline such as jumpers with turtle, rolled or polo neck and will always need to leave the top button of a blouse undone. I’ve also had to give away three of my jumpers recently as they were a little bit scratchy on the inside and caused me irritation.
  • Other sensory stimuli can cause overwhelm. This could include bright light, noisy or crowded places.
  • You tend to have less tolerance to pain than others.
  • You prefer to work in a very quiet environment which is free from distractions e.g. you have found working alone from home to be preferable to working in an open plan office.
  • You find any sort of change difficult or upsetting whether it is positive or negative e.g. being in a new relationship or getting a job promotion can cause extreme amounts of stress. HSPs tend to find a lot of comfort in routine and anything new or different can cause overstimulation.
  • Raised voices and an angry tone can cause tension and upset even if the rage isn’t aimed at you.
  • You tend to be a people pleaser as you don’t want to let people down. This may lead to you saying yes when you really want to say no.
  • When you’re feeling really hungry, you might find your emotions are affected quite strongly resulting in you getting ‘hangry’, irritable and moody. I think most people have experienced being in a bad mood when they’re haven’t eaten for ages but in a HSP, this might happen more regularly or felt more strongly. According to Dr Aron, this is because HSPs are more sensitive to spikes and dips in blood sugar levels.
  • Stimulants affect you more than others. You might find caffeine gives you a real buzz even if you consume very little. Alcohol may have the same effect.
  • You hate conflict and tried to avoid it as much as possible. This may result in you doing or saying whatever you can to keep the other person happy.
  • You may avoid TV shows and films which contain lots of violence because they feel too intense and leave you unsettled. As someone who loves watching crime dramas and anything psychological, this one doesn’t really apply to me but if you find yourself being triggered you will definitely want to choose your evening viewing with great care.
  • Any form of criticism can be distressing and often completely devastating. This can result in people pleasing, criticizing yourself first before anyone else gets the chance or simply avoided the source of criticism. This is certainly one of my main triggers and something I have struggled with from childhood and right through my adult life. It doesn’t matter if the criticism is meant to be constructive or falls in the middle of a number of compliments – I will nearly always be deeply upset and often go over things in my head again and again. Praise can leave me on a high all day but even a slight criticism can make my mood plummet in seconds and completely spoil my day or the rest of my week if I let it.
  • You may find yourself being deeply moved by music and other creative pieces such as works of art, poetry, drama and writing.

Ways to manage your sensitivity on a day-to-day basis

Create a set morning and evening routine Set routines provide an element of control even when everything around you is changing. For me, my morning routine includes a short journalling session, a healthy breakfast of wholewheat cereal and a piece of fruit, 15 minutes of non-fiction reading (with a cup of coffee), stretches, stepping outside to listen to the birds and check on how the garden is doing, and setting my intentions for the day. In the evening, I’ll get my PJs on, do something mindful like my jigsaw or playing a game on my tablet, then my husband and I will watch something on TV. My phone is set to automatically transition to night mode at 8.00pm and I tried to avoid using my electronic devices after this (very much a work in progress at the moment!). Just before bed, I’ll think about how my day has gone and do some reflective journalling. I’ve just bought The Five Minute journal to make my sessions more structured and I hope to write a blog post on how this is going very soon.

Make sure you get a good night’s sleep We all know that quality sleep is essential for our physical and mental health and it is especially important for HSPs. If you know that this is an area of your life you could benefit from working on, check out this post which contains an in-depth look into the topic.

Plan in some downtime HSPs can become easily overwhelmed so it’s important to schedule in regular times each day for resting and recharging. As I’ve shared in a previous post, I use the Pomodoro Technique during the day and I consider the five minute breaks to be vital for preventing overwhelm. I also schedule in longer breaks with plans for relaxing or mindful activities such as drawing or painting, listening to music or going for a walk in nature.

Create a sanctuary space in your environment which feels calm and safe This could be a comfortable chair in your living room, an outdoor location at the bottom of your garden or a spot in your conservatory. If you share your home with others, let them know how important this sanctuary is to you and why you find time and space beneficial. You might also want to consider making your home a more pleasant place to be as a whole by keeping rooms clutter free and well-organised. This is something I’m working on right now, especially in my craft room as this is where I often spend most of my day.

Eat a healthy diet and make sure you eat regularly through the day Try to include plenty of fresh fruit and vegetables each day and use the balanced plate to ensure you get enough of the different food groups. Make sure you eat regularly to avoid feeling hangry. Check out this blog post for more information on maintaining a healthy diet.

Consider trying mindful exercise Good choices of mindful exercise include Tai Chi, yoga and Pilates. I also try to stay in the moment during gym sessions by really focusing on how my body feels during each exercise. I try to schedule my gym visits when I know that it is relatively quiet (mid afternoon is a good time for me) as even with ear plugs in, I tend to get over stimulated if there’s lots going on around me. Fitting in a daily peaceful walk in nature is also really beneficial, especially if you choose spaces and times that are less busy.

Use soft lighting in your home When you’re out and about during the day, the type and strength of lighting is generally out of your control. However, in your home, you can choose soft lighting such as candles, lamps, less powerful bulbs and dimmer switches to make things more comfortable.

Identify your triggers When reading the above list, some of the points are likely to have resonated with you more than others – perhaps you found noisy crowds really difficult to cope with or maybe too much social media creates information overload or feelings of inadequacy. Whatever you particularly struggle with, make notes and then work on finding ways to combat them e.g. going shopping when it’s quieter, limiting your time online, carrying snacks for if you start to feel hungry, taking regular mind breaks etc.

Talk to a therapist Working with a therapist, specifically to develop strategies for managing your particular difficulties can really help. Try to choose someone who knows about HSPs so they can offer more specialist advice and support.

Celebrate your positive qualities Although being an HSP comes with its difficulties, it also provides gifts and real strengths which should be celebrated and put to good use. Awesome traits of the HSP can include creativity, conscientiousness, being deeply intuitive, having excellent problem solving skills being and being empathetic.

Final words…

I hope you have found today’s post interesting and informative. With approximately 15-20% of the general population being considered as Highly Sensitive, it’s likely that even if you don’t recognise yourself as a HSP, a loved one, family member, friend or work colleague may have some of the difficulties presented above and would benefit from developing strategies to manage day-to-day life. Personally, I find that I struggle a lot more during periods of low or high mood and things don’t affect me as much at times of stability. I also think that increased stress and pressure can also make things much more difficult and this is when it becomes even more important to apply the above coping strategies.

I would love to hear your thoughts on today’s topic so feel free to leave a comment below if you wish to do so.

Posted in Bipolar disorder, depression, depression management, lifestyle, mental health, wellbeing, wellness

Monday Matters: Wheel Of Wellness – Occupational

Posted on by Laura

For today’s blog post on The Wheel Of Wellness I’ll be focusing on the Occupational segment. This section is all about finding meaningful ways to occupy your time whether that be doing a job you enjoy and get personal satisfaction from, volunteering your time and services for a particular cause such as a charity, helping the community in some way (either in person or online), raising a family or simply being a good partner / friend / mum or dad / sibling / pet owner etc.

When we think of the term ‘occupation’, our thoughts tend to turn to our job or the way we earn a living. However, some of us, myself included, are currently classed as unemployed (for whatever reason), in education, or are retired, but we still occupy our time in a number of useful ways. So, throughout today’s article, I’ll be talking about occupation in the broadest sense i.e. as a way of spending time, particularly in a manner that is useful for ourselves, our family and friends or our wider community.

Occupational wellness

To maintain occupational wellness, it’s important to consider how what we do impacts on our general health – both physically and mentally. Does your work leave you feeling good about yourself and as though you’re really making a difference or do you dread each and every week, feel constantly exhausted, dissatisfied and undervalued? If you volunteer your time for a good cause, does your line manager thank you regularly and encourage you to recognise the impact you’re are having both on yourself and the organisation or do you feel unappreciated and as though it is a struggle to think of the benefits? If, like me, you’re a blogger, do you get a buzz when someone likes your post, follows you or leaves a nice comment or do you feel like you invest too much time on your writing and have lost your spark? For those of you who are retired, have you adjusted to your circumstances, and are you happy with how you structure your days, or do you feel like you would benefit from making changes which support both your physical and mental health? Whatever you current situation, do you feel well motivated, happy and purposeful or is there room for improvement in this area of your wellness?

My own experience of occupational wellbeing (and lack of)

(N.B. these paragraphs may be triggering for individuals who are currently struggling with their mood in some way or have a diagnosis of Bipolar Disorder)

Before my diagnosis of Bipolar disorder, when I was teaching, there were periods of time in my work when I felt on top of the world, superior to most of my colleagues and as though I was making such a difference to the pupils and the school as a whole that I was a complete asset. At other times, I felt demotivated, dreaded each week, struggled to get out of bed and get things done and found my work-life completely unbalanced and unmanageable – drowning both at home and at work. For the rest of the time, I was satisfied with the way my career was going, felt I was becoming better and better at my job and was, along with most of my colleagues making a real difference. I also felt that I was able to manage my workload and had the ability to say ‘no’ when necessary. The swings in mood I was experiencing were exacerbated by occupational / work-related stress but were also heavily affected by a mental health condition that I was unaware I had.

At the time, during a period of severe depression, I was convinced the solution was to give up my job and career and that following handing in my notice, everything would be perfect. I was devastated that this was the answer as I’d wanted to be a primary school teacher from my early childhood but, I was making myself ill and it just couldn’t continue. However, I soon realised that although some aspects of my situation had improved (less stress, better work-life balance, more time for self care for example), my mood swings (although not as severe) continued and I had highs, extreme lows and periods of balance. When I was stable, I would set goals for myself and filled my time in productive ways. I would wake up feeling good and ready to get on with things. When I was depressed, I completely lost my confidence, had extreme anxiety and felt like I was a waste of space and no use to anyone. When I was high (shortly after a depressive episode), I slept very little, was brimming with ideas for what I wanted to do and achieve, flitted from project to project often leaving them half unfinished, spent money on all sorts of items as everything looked attractive and definitely on my want/need list and basically felt like I could take on the world. This eventually caused burn out and resulted in another bout of depression or physical unwellness.

Fast forward a good few years and, although I still have mental health difficulties, a correct diagnosis, medication for my illness, a range of therapies and help from my support worker have put me in a much better place and I’m currently able to manage my moods more easily and occupy my days in useful ways that leave me satisfied and feeling like I’m making a difference (however small). I’m also able to add in mindful and calming activities into my day and can recognise when I need to take breaks and when I might be doing too much.

As some of you who read my blog posts regularly will know, I’m continually working on my physical and mental health in a number of effective ways and I even have paid work lined up with my local university for next month which will make full use of my skillset whilst offering me the opportunity to take a break during any future periods of mental ill health. I also have the chance to work and socialise with other individuals who have physical and/or mental health difficulties so I will feel less alone. For the first time since I resigned from teaching, I feel like my occupational wellness is getting to where it should be.

Asking yourself questions to consider your occupational wellness

I think it’s really important to reflect on the different aspects of your life regularly and consider how things are going. Asking questions can be hugely beneficial. Of course, the assessment questions you ask yourself will differ depending on your current life situation but below I’ve shared some examples which you can pick and choose from depending which are most relevant. You might want to spend some time thinking and considering your answers but another good idea is to make notes or do some journalling so you can deep dive into how things are for you, and evaluate if your needs are being met. This kind of activity is great for self care and building self awareness.

Again, I’ve tried my best to include everyone here but I apologise in advance if you feel like most or all of the questions aren’t relevant to you. If this is the case, you are more than welcome to drop a comment explaining why and I’ll rack my brains and see if I can create a few tailor made question ideas.

  • How would you rate your current happiness and life satisfaction? Why?
  • What is it about your current role or the way you occupy your time that makes you want to get up in the morning?
  • What does an average week / work week look like to you? Does this support your physical and mental health? Why? Why not?
  • Do you feel like your current employment / routine offers opportunities to expand your skills and use your strengths? Why? Why not?
  • If you are a student, do your chosen subjects interest you and are you learning well? Does your degree choice suit you and are you getting the help and support you need to learn? Are you able to study independently? Have you found the right balance between studying and enjoying life?
  • What are your career / life aspirations?
  • What do you feel is important in your life right now? Does your occupation / lifestyle reflect this? If there are areas for improvement, what changes do you think you could make?
  • Do you feel that you’re currently achieving balance between your work and leisure time? Are there any ways you could tweak things?
  • What opportunities do you currently have to use your individual gifts, skills and talents (try making a list of them first if you’re unsure what they are) in order to gain purpose, happiness and enrichment in your life?
  • Does how you currently occupy your time support your physical health? Why? Why not?
  • Does how you currently occupy your time support your mental health? Why? Why not?
  • Can you identify one change you could make to your life right now that would have a positive impact on your physical or mental health? (this could be asking for help rather than taking on all of the responsibility yourself, or simple putting your foot down and saying no!)
  • Social connection is considered important for wellbeing (even during periods of low mood). Can you name the ways you connect with others on a regular basis? Do these connections help or hinder your mental health? Are there any changes you’d like to make in this area to improve your wellbeing? Do you shy away from social situations during periods of depression / anxiety or low mood? Can you think of ways to remain socially connected that seem management during difficult times?
  • How do you manage your work related / family stress and responsibilities? If you struggle in this area, can you think of ways to improve?
  • What’s your current attitude towards life / work? Does this support your health or not? Why?

What about if I’m struggling with depression right now and feel pretty useless?

As someone with bipolar disorder, I have plenty of experience of depressive episodes and recognise the daily struggles. However, what I’ve learnt is that, if you feel like you’ve achieved nothing with your day, it tends to make you feel much worse. For this reason, creating a structure or plan for your time can really help. This might include going to your local recovery college to learn something new, identifying small and achievable tasks to do on each day of the week or planning activities which you know (either now or in the past) have given you a little mood boost such as going for a walk in nature, meeting a friend for coffee or doing something mindful such as colouring in, working on a jigsaw or doing some word puzzles. Then, by bedtime, you can celebrate all of your achievements no matter how tiny they are. And don’t forget, even something like getting out of bed and getting dressed shouldn’t be dismissed! Check out my post on Behavioural Activation if you want more help with making a daily plan.

Final words…

I hope you’ve found today’s blog post interesting or helpful in some way and it has made you think about your occupational wellbeing. I’ve tried to include something for everyone no matter what your current situation as I know my readers are all individual and at different stages of their lives. Let me know in the comments if a question or idea has particularly resonated with you as I love to hear the opinions and thoughts of others.

Until next time, take care.

Posted in Bipolar disorder, depression management, lifestyle, mental health, wellbeing, wellness

Monday Matters: Wheel of Wellness – Financial

Posted on by Laura

This week, in my series of posts on The Wheel of Wellness, I’ll be focusing on the financial segment. This aspect is all about living within your means and learning to manage your finances both in the short term and long term. I’ll be considering the impact that some mental health conditions may have on your money and will also be sharing some tips for managing your finances effectively, particularly if some of your issues are related to your mood.

What is finance?

Finance is concerned with the management of money and, on a personal level, includes activities such as spending, saving, investing, borrowing and budgeting. It’s about meeting your short and long term financial needs and living within your means, in other words, spending no more money than you have. To help you manage your finances, it’s important to become ‘financially literate’ which basically means having a good relationship with money and become well educated on the various aspects of finance.

Mood disorders and your finances

Most people dislike talking about money but it’s important that you develop your understanding of the different aspects of finance so you can keep yourself financially well. If, like me, you live with depression and/or bipolar disorder you will understand that managing your finances can be a source of distress, particularly during periods of mental illness. Although we all have different experiences, when depressed, you may find yourself struggling to make money decisions or deal with aspects of your finances. You might also try to make yourself feel better by spending money buying nice things. You could find yourself unable to work or have to take time off when you’re unwell and this can also make things hard. During times of mania or hypomania (very elevated or elevated mood) you may find yourself having frenzied spending sprees or making expensive purchases which you / your family can’t afford.

For example, during periods of hypomania, I tend to buy lots of things to fix problems e.g. neat or cute matching storage containers to create order and look good at the same time, the latest kitchen gadgets which I’ve spotted online, new blankets/cushions for our sofa to replace ones which are slightly past their best but we can manage with just fine etc. Also, everything in the shops seems to develop a rosy glow and is heightened in attractiveness and I have to stop myself buying it all. When I watch craft videos on YouTube, I need to have those exact pens in those colours shown, particular stickers or ephemera because it all looks so pretty or a certain gadget / crafty resource so that I can make similar things to those demonstrated. Then, when I get depressed, I get upset because my craft room is bursting at the seams with all of the things I’ve bought and I have no motivation to make anything or use any of my supplies.

Money management tips

If you think you would benefit from increasing your financial wellbeing, you might like to consider the tips I’ve put together below. Some are general tips related to learning more about your personal finances and budgeting, whilst others are specifically targeted at those of you who find that your mental health has a direct influence on your money management.

Know what your current financial status is

Spend some time getting to know your current money situation. Make a note of what is in your savings account, your current account and your ISA if you have one. Also, become familiar with your debts e.g. how much is left to pay on your mortgage?, what do you owe on any loans you may have? do you owe any friends or family some money? etc. Learn how much income you / your household have coming in each month and so on. You could create a spread in your bullet journal such as me and my money or create an e-record on your mobile phone.

Examine your cash flow

When you know how much you earn each month or how much you receive in benefits, find out how much you typically spend and on what. Try creating a tracker for income and expenditure for a month to get a better idea of your incomings and outgoings. You could also consider looking at your spending habits at different times e.g. when depressed, manic or hypomanic or when your mood is stable (neither high nor low).

You could do a paper version of this in your bullet journal or a notebook as shown below or you can use a free app which calculates your spending and deducts the money you from your monthly income. I found a couple of Android apps which were really easy to use by doing a quick search on Google Play.

Source: Laura Jones for Keeping It Creative blog

If recording your expenses seems a little overwhelming right now, you could start by look at your monthly bank statements to see where your money is going each month. Although it won’t identify exactly what you purchased, it will tell you the name of the shop or business for each transaction.

Create a monthly budget

This is definitely something to do when you’re feeling well as it can be quite time consuming and requires good concentration and forethought. Once you’ve examined your cash flow situation you’ll know what your income is like and the kinds of things you purchase each month or each quarter. You’ll also know if you’re spending more or less than you have coming in and how much you are able to save (or not).

A monthly budget is a plan for how you will spend your money each month. It’s a popular way to manage your finances as lots of recurring expenses such as mortgage, rent, mobile phone etc. occur on a monthly basis. If you know what your income is each month, you can make sure you spend less than you have coming in. That way you can try to save a small amount of money with a view to creating an emergency fund for any unplanned spends.

There’s lots of information and advice online from money experts about how to create and stick to a budget but the key steps are outlined below:

  1. Calculate your monthly income – only consider consistent sources, not one off things like selling unwanted stuff on Ebay or money you get for your birthday
  2. Track your spending (see above)
  3. Consider your financial goals – this could be something like saving up for a deposit on a house, your wedding or a new car but could also be something small like reining in the amount you spend on clothes each month so you can put money aside for a holiday.
  4. Create your budget – make a list of all of the things you spend money on each month and allocate an amount to each category. This could include spending more or less on your favourite hobbies, cutting down on eating out and takeaways etc. A popular rule for creating a budget is the 50/30/20 rule where you allocate 50% of your income to needs, 30% towards wants and 20% towards savings.
  5. Continue tracking your expenses and refine your budget as and when necessary – do your spending habits align with your budget? have your financial goals changed? etc.

Identify your triggers

If your spending varies depending on how you feel, you might want to track your spending and your mood at the same time. Then, you can identify your triggers. For example, you may self soothe by shopping for little (or larger) treats in attempt to make yourself feel better when you’re depressed. You might overspend when you’re feeling high because each purchase comes with a little thrill or you have boundless energy for a frenzied shopping spree. Once you know your triggers, you can create a plan for managing them or seek advice and support from a professional.

Take steps to manage your spending

If you know your spending tends to get a little out of control during periods of mental illness, try to create a plan when you’re feeling well and maybe share it with close family and friends. This could include:

  • leaving your debit / credit card at home and drawing out a limited amount of cash for your shopping
  • shop with a friend or family member who can rein in your spending. You may argue against their recommendations, but ask them to persevere!
  • get rid of your credit card altogether so you can’t spend money you haven’t got
  • ask you ‘shopping partner’ to encourage you to think it over before making a decision to purchase. Is the urge to buy still there is a few days time or after you’ve slept on it? Most overspending is caused by impulse purchasing which you are likely to regret later!
  • if you think you might be about to have an online shopping spree, try to distract yourself with something else which makes you feel good such as reading a book, doing some work in the garden or tending to your houseplants, having a relaxing bath or doing some yoga

Set up direct debits

During periods of difficulty you may have little energy or motivation to pay bills or manage your finances. Setting up direct debits (instructions for your bank to authorise payment when they’re due) for your monthly and quarterly bills such as your broadband, mobile phone, energy, council tax etc. makes things easier and safer and ensures you don’t forget to pay and become in arrears.

Seek medical help

If you feel your money issues are related to your mental health e.g. spending to cheer yourself up when depressed or going on manic spending sprees when you feel high, try talking to your GP, CPN or psychiatrist. Your GP should be able to refer you to the mental health team or your psychiatrist may tweak your medication or advise you upon therapy which may help to manage your symptoms.

Get free professional advice

If you live in the UK and are currently in debt you can get free advice from a number of places such as Step Change, Turn2Us, National Debtline and most people’s favourite money saving expert Martin Lewis. You can also seek our information of different benefits which may be available to you. Bipolar UK is a good source of advice and their website also has a selection of stories about money issues and a section dedicated to finances in their forum.

Ask for help from a loved one

Depending on the severity of your issues, you may just need to ask for help from your partner or a trusted friend. You can ask them to monitor your spending and intervene when necessary e.g. helping you to organise pay your bills when you’re depressed or look after your credit and debit cards during periods of mania or hypomania. You can also ask them to look out for changes in your behaviour related to spending during periods of mental illness.

Check out supportive webpages and sites

There’s a wealth of information available online relating to finances and there’s some particularly useful bits and pieces about money and mental health. Here’s some I found following a quick search:

Coping with financial worries and debt

If you have money worries right now you may struggle to control your emotions and have feelings of guilt, shame, stress, embarrassment and exhaustion. This can lead to low mood and worsening of your mental health. You may be tempted to bury your head in the sand and hope that things will get better at some point but, although it might be really difficult and overwhelming, you should try to take control and find a way forward (easier said than done I know). Many people are currently struggling with managing their finances but there’s lots of help out there in the community and online so you’re definitely not alone. Also, remember the saying a problem shared is a problem halved. If you thought a good friend was having money issues you would want him or her to reach out and not feel ashamed of their situation so try to be self compassionate and seek some help and support.

Final words…

Ultimately, managing your personal finances depends on all kinds of factors including your income streams and how steady they are, your employment status e.g. student, self employed, unemployed etc, your current non-negotiable monthly outgoings such as your mortgage or rent payments, your savings and how much you wish to increase them by if at all, any benefits you are entitled to, your dependents and your financial goals. However, if you dedicate some time to assessing your cash flow by examining your income and expenditure then you will become better educated with regard to your current situation and this will help you to manage your budget. By learning about the link between mental health and money you can identify your own issues and seek help with them, either from resources online, friends and family or professionals.

I hope you’ve found the information contained within today’s post helpful and it has encouraged you to think about getting on top of your finances if you feel it’s an area of your wellbeing that you might like to work on.